Rachael Sage : bird feeder

October 2016

bird feeder

"bird feeder" - 10/04/16

I grew up thinking of needles

As more than the enemy

I had many occasions to think of them

Because someone in my family required them

All too often for sustenance I wasn't afraid

Of the occasional pin prick blood draw

Vaccination seesawing between homeopathic

And germaphobic the upshot is I avoided shots

Altogether but when required I just shut my eyes

Knowing guiltily whatever I was feeling was painless

Comparatively and that's what I feel right now

Looking at you weathered beyond your years

Impervious to advice diaphanously tears belie

The sensitivity you strive so hard to mask

I ask you for nothing I offer only friendship

And although we have connected more deeply

Than you will ever admit and I would never resubmit

To a heart so changeable the love I offer now

Is unconditional it requires no answer an open door schul

The only membership I encourage you to entertain would be

The possibility your irritation's indicative of self-loathing

The only courtship I'd ever indulge in when it comes

To you my erstwhile sun is the one that flaunts

By example a passion for ancient symbols you said

You wanted to go to India well I am going and if at any point

You decide to become someone of your word I will always

Have ears to listen currents to lift you hummingbird

Resolution

"Resolution" - 10/03/16

I want a lover whose cheerleading shouts me out loudly as perfectly flawed

I want a lover whose quiet self-confidence cherishes compliments nonetheless

I want a lover who fathoms as firmly as I do the beauty of the one night stand

Eager to sing, write or paint about such ephemeral encounters indefinitely

But only because of a fondness for undressing dialectics like death vs. infinity

I want a lover who revels shamelessly in nothing more than the evidence

Of everything perceived while making a point to improve others' existence

Arousing revolution no matter what angular agnosticism inevitably becomes

Sacred kindling for compassion's ambition gutted by resolve pressing

Empathy's imprint upon us every kiss a pomegranate seed conceding bliss

Veneer

"Veneer" 10/1/16

Would it surprise you to know in hindsight I was a newbie

To the one-night-stand unlike you I was actually trying hard

To have no expectations it was challenging but I've never been

One to shy away from a social experiment I thought if I tried

To be more like you I might understand you better granted it was

A subconscious plan an unwitting submission to a feckless fate

I might feel weightless gratified modern redeemed preemptively

Saved from what I'm still not sure oh who are we kidding I imagined

I'd seduced you from multiple stages letting you kiss me

Letting you whisk me away to uncomfortable surroundings

Reverse immersion into my hyper color movie Moroccan pillows

Glittering sequins shoe-shined silver-lined cinematic skylines

My eyes are burning now not from crying but from this Mohave wind

Out of sight out of mind you said you'd be a friend were you acting then

Or was I just not listening when you un-whispered secrets I must've

Had my ear turned away at that flippant moment when you first revealed

A shift in character it doesn't take much to pretend to care even a little

The definition of narcissism is less malleable than my need for resolve

It seems to me a testament to absurdity there was ever a girl you loved

The way you slammed this unlucky door shut slipped away in the middle

Of the night minutes after getting what you thought you might want

Enough to take it away you ran what kind of man doesn't even explain

If it was just too irritating to feel something or not enough of what

You needed all you had to do was say so whether you're an impressive

Flake or a depressive passive-aggressor either way I'm the poorer

For having given the benefit of reverence to a vacuum whose veneer

Of affection whitewashed my typically good judgement the way you looked

Right through me fooled me truth slept soundly while you sure screwed me